heavy and hopeful heart

Why is it that the longer I wait to update my blog- the harder it is to say what I'm trying to say? Thus I wait longer to write, and it gets more difficult to articulate. That seems to be what happens to everything I put on my to-do list-- it just gets harder and harder to get done. So I'm going to write you an update- and apologize from the beginning for it's rough edges.

It's Tuesday, April 22 here-- we're in the middle of our mid-semester break-- and I must say it has been a wonderful, needed break. I've had a chance to catch my ministry-breath and to try and re-energize myself. Some days I'm more successful at this than others. I suppose though that the best way to update you is with a lovely list of what's been happening:

• I have been spending most of my days with the students at Victoria University (although there are 3 other campuses in Welli), trying to build relationships and help students to see God in all of life. Most people (myself included) wonder what our schedules should look like to do this so I'll paint as best a picture as I can. Most mornings I spend doing Bible study planning, thinking though what needs done for the ministry, what needs my girls have, and growing in my understanding of Scripture. After this time, we have designated the hours each day from 10am-4pm "hot hours" where we make out best effort to be on campus. During this time I have 4 different Bible studies, prayer times, or time to connect with students whom I'm building relationships with. What does that mean? The best example I have is of a group of 1st year students who meet in the bar on campus every Tuesday afternoon to chill out with one another. They have invited Justin and I to join them whenever we want. So we make our best effort to place ourselves in their world and to meet them where they're at spiritually. Right now the group has 4-5 regulars. One guy calls himself a Christian but struggles to stay sober most days. He's really honest about his life- but the rest of the group knows he's a Christian and I'm sure become confused by his actions. One guy in the group is a strong atheist who comes from no church background. Through him I met his girlfriend- and this is where the story gets interesting. I don't want to use names- but his girlfriend comes from a "strong Christian background." She grew up going to church and believing in God. As she started Uni a few months ago and dating her atheist boyfriend, she decided to start really thinking about her beliefs. This led her to read "The God Delusion," a best-selling book right now all about having a fulfilling life of atheism. Her parents are fighting with her constantly about reading it, her professors are praising her new found agnosticism, and she will gladly discuss with me all the reasons for not believing in God. And she has plenty. After the first conversation I had with her, my heart was heavy. We chatted for an hour or two about the things she was learning through her philosophy class and "The God Delusion," and I walked away feeling the weight of my job. I felt the weight of all the students around me. I felt the weight of Christians in today's very post-Christian culture, and I felt the weight of her personal experience with Christianity.

• The next week, the weight didn't lighten up much. I was sitting in the atrium preparing to leave campus for the day and thinking about my goal for the week to engage with students on the outside of the uni culutre--when a guy sat across from me. Not wanting to pass up the opportunity, I engaged in conversation with him and soon enough he was explaining to me his spiritual beliefs for the next hour or so. He believes in a higher power, he knows his life is meant to be much more than living for himself, he seeks to understand others at all times, has 1 Christian friend who he admires, and he's gay. He's studying religion and loves chatting about his beliefs. Once again- my job didn't feel like an easy one.

• So what have I been learning and doing beyond this? The first thing that I've been confronted with is the fact that God is the one in control. He's the one speaking inside of these students, and He's the one with the power. Through Him I seek to love these students and to point towards Jesus in whatever way I can. If they believe we are a 1 in billion biological accident- I try to affirm in them that they are so much more. If they can't believe in Christianity b/c they don't want to sit on a cloud and strum a harp all day, I try to discover with them that this is not at all the hope we have with Jesus. If they hate or mistrust Christians because they've seen actions that don't line up with their words, I seek to line up my words and my actions and live them out for them. Whether it's a girl who meets with me for Bible study, or a gay friend I've made- I ask God to help me live my faith out with them and to love them for who He's made them to be.
  

• So there have been days when my heart feels so heavy that I'm not sure I can do it. There have been days when I ask God why the heck He's set up the world this way. But there have been days when I thank God for every amazing thing He is doing and every amazing person He has placed in my path. I thank Him for allowing me to journey with Him, for his depth!, His grace, His incomprehensible love, His promises, and for the way He provides me with the hope and faith to press on.
  

Being that it's April and I just got an email from the Crusade headquarters asking me what's next- plans for the future have been whirling around in my head. Oh man has this placed me back in the world of the students I serve. I'm asking myself some big questions about where, what, who, and why. If you know exactly where I'm headed next please let me know!

I can't write this blog without expressing to you how much I ADORE THE WELLI MOSAIC COMMUNITY! Some days I step back and admire God for placing me right here and right now because it just seems so fitting. No the community is not perfect. But could I have asked for a better fit for what God is teaching me right now- absolutely not. This is a community- who like they told me from the 1st day-- have jumped out of a plane to go after God-- and I love going through the sky with them! (it's as fun as sky diving was)!

Thank you heaps and heaps for those of you who I've gotten to chat with recently to energize me and reconnect me with life at home!!!! Sometimes I cry just thinking about home, yet it makes me think about crying when I realize I only have a visa here for 7 more months. Even though I have no idea where God is taking me next, or even this afternoon, I am extremely thankful for the ways God gives me dreams and teaches me how to go after them. And I am thankful for all of you that let me dream. Much prayer and love goes your way!
~Lacey Leigh

ps- I just realized I didn't really wrap up the story of my friends on campus-- but although it's beyond my understanding-- they continue to meet with Justin and I each week to chat about life and God. I have to believe that God is doing His thing.

pps- If you buy one thing this week for yourself-- buy "Everything is Spiritual" it's a dvd of a talk by Rob Bell. Since I can quote it now I think I've watched it a few too many times-- but I love it!!!! http://shop.everythingisspiritual.com/ -- check it out!

Baby Ellery!!!!

One of the sweetest bits of news this month-- Justin's sister and bro-in-law had a lil girl-- Ellery!! Now I have an Ella and an Elle to love on. Sooooooo cute! And so makes me want to come home and meet her.

We do still exist.

J and I with our new haircuts:) We took a lil photo so you can all see our new do's-- especially you Jim- You told me to cut his hair- so I did. We're sitting outside of my flat on one of our last :( sunny days for a while prolly.

Easter wishes!

Happy Happy Easter everyone! I posted a lil film of my flat in Wellington- not that exciting- but may help you picture more of my life here. I know that it's blurry and you can't really even see me- but I had to make the file small. I'll post another one sometime where you can actually see me and hopefully Justin, too. I miss everyone lots. Easter weeekned has been great and we have today (Monday) off as well. New Zealanders take their holidays seriously... well not really- but they do know how to get a lil r&r. Hope Easter is filled with hope for you! ~ Lace

Lacey's Home Tour

life is like a retractable pencil

It's the middle of March... how did that happen? I get to come home for a week in 2.5 months!!! So thrilled to get to stand next to Min as she gets married. And to snuggle with Ella-- yes Ella we will even sleep together when I'm home. And to hug Mom & Dad, and see my siblings, and go to Panera, visit Otterbein, and put my clothes in the dryer! Oh how excited I am!

This week and the past week we've had visitors from the States here to encourage us and to help us with the ministry- which has been cool- but as I sat down with the woman who is the director of NZ ministries in Indy I knew she was wise when she said, "This time of year can be hard, you're at the point where you know you've been here for a while, yet you still have a while to go." Yes- I'm feeling it. We've lived in Welli for about 5.5 months, but we're here for 8 more and while I do LOVE Welli, I am confronted with the reality that I miss people, I miss feeling like an insider, I miss driving on the right side of the road. The hardest part is that I don't want to leave here, I just want to be here and there. Ahhhhh!

So enough of that. Let me update you on the ministry here and why my life is a roller coaster. It has been super exciting to sit down with some of the Kiwi women here and really talk about life and faith. I've met girls who are fighting depression, just coming out of depression, figuring out what they believe, deciding how to live what they believe, and some are simply trying to find a Christian community that can push them while at Uni. I have about 15 women right now who are going to meet with me weekly and journey with me and probably teach me more than I teach them. One of my biggest prayer requests is for Emma-- she and I are going to meet and chat about Christianity each week, b/c she said that she believes in God, but from there feels very lost about her beliefs. She is so smart and so honest-- and I would love for her to fall in love with Jesus. Please pray that God would work in her life.

The highlights are great- but of course there are low lights, too. Some days it feels like every student is too busy to care about God. Some days I look around and think that we are ignoring the students who most desperately need or want to believe- the goth crowd, the homosexual crowd, the alcoholic crowd-- and I just don't know how to love them well. Some days I don't feel like I'm doing enough. And some days I feel like my faith isn't enough. Some days I'm just annoyed with every person around me. And it was one of these days when I read an article which talked about loving people. It said that loving people is one of the most powerful ways which we worship God. He loves when we truly care about His creation. Man-- that was hard to read when I was feeling like I just don't love people. I want my faith to push me further into loving people well... not push me away from people. I guess I really can't do this on my own.

In conclusion: 1. please pray for Emma 2. please pray for each of us to truly love people 3. if you could figure out a way for people to be in 2 places at once that would be sweet az.

The best way I can think to end this blog is to have you check out the funniest thing I've seen in a long time: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0rtaDDSvxY It's a song from 2 comedians from Welli-- they have a show in the states and it is HILARIOUS. Sometimes inappropriate, but still funny. If you watch it 10 times it gets funnier each time. (I'm laughing at it now)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIB! And sorry Mom that this isn't a video blog- I'll keep working on it. Love and miss you guys-- really. Lace

chicken dinner

Happy Monday morning everyone! Well it's technically still Sunday in the States... but it's back to school for us here. I'm feeling excited going into this week- but still a bit intimidated by all the new students. I'd love for you to join in praying with me this week...

Monday: That God would transform the lives of students-- no matter where they're at in the journey.
Tuesday: That our team would have a genuine love for the students.
Wednesday: For God's power in our ministry to meet and reach new students. This day we will be trying to meet and talk with thousands of students.
Thursday: For me to not be scared or overwhelmed, but to be encouraged by who God is.
Friday: That we would have faith to love the unlovable, to trust God with all things.

It still awes me to think about all of you praying for the people here and how powerful your prayers are. So thank you heaps for your love. I'm totally due for a new blog post, I'm sorry if I've kept you waiting. But I'll try to update you on some of the happenings here.

the ministry: Oh man have I learned lots already and oh man how much more I have to learn! The past 2 weeks I have been immersed in the planning/ preparing/ praying stages of ministry and some days have been harder than others. I totally love and appreciate these aspects of my "job" but if any of you have been a part of such planning-- it can be paralysing. Are we doing this the best way possible? Are we following God by doing this? Are we just saying this or are we doing this? Do we understand the message we are sending? Day after day I have been talking with my teammates, reading books, and asking God to lead us-- but I have realised even more through this that God is gonna have to do His thing here or none of this will work. This is indeed why I have asked you to join with me in prayer. Two things have stood out to me this last week on campus:

• 1. Uni students are bombarded with clubs, businesses, classes, and causes that their lives should be about. While on campus for the 1st day back I was approached by the bank 4 times to sign up for their deal!!!! How can I show someone who God is w/o acting like the consumer-hungry bank?
• 2. Seeing all of the 1st year students arrive and head to the clubs and parties in droves has reminded me that I'm gonna have to get off my butt to reach these students. They are at the party, not church. I've been thinking about how movements start on the outskirts anyways... how can I place myself there and not fear the darkness in these places?

mosaic: Again- I feel like I have learned more from my experiences with Mosaic than I could have imagined-- or even knew that I needed to learn. When I began the church search here in Welli I thought it would be lovely- I would find a place that suits me and all would be grand. When we found the Mosaic community I fell in love. In the past month I think I had to take a step back and realise it was only lust-- it was me going after a church just like we go after relationships- with ourselves in mind. Don't get me wrong- Mosaic is a place to truly love, and I am beginning to, but this takes time, patience, perseverance, and lots of relationship building. The times and things I'm learning through Mosaic push me further like no other church experience has. It was good for me to take a step back- from myself.

Welli: I love this city. That is basically all I need to say. I love Wellington. Ahhhh amazing! The times that make me fall more in love with this place are my jogs along the waterfront-- I could do this everyday if I had time! And of course all the cafes. Please come visit... you'll love it too!

K-- all for now. Oh and yes I embarrassed myself again this week-- this time with my teammates. I thought I would make a lovely chicken dinner. I breaded it with all these lovely spices and bread crumbs, put it in the oven to bake.... and then Sarah asked me if I meant to make breaded pork chops. Of course-- who doesn't know chicken from pork???? :)

Love and miss all of you!!!! Please pray with me this week-- Lacey

Sweetness

He's not just a pretty face... but he does have a pretty face.

Baby fix

Baby Hudson... he is precious. How fun to have a baby on our team!!!!

inside my head

I really can't fathom where each week goes. Today is Thursday, February 7th, but it might as well be Monday. I can't recall what happened to Monday through Wednesday-- well I think I can, but still, time flies. It has been a good week so far- our team feels a bit more complete as 1 of the Kiwi men has moved in with Justin and students are beginning to come around more often. Our team is so excited to get back on campus in a week or so! In preperation of the school year starting, our team has been reading the book, Organic Church, which I'm really enjoying- so I thought I'd share some thoughts/ questions that I've been having stemming from the book. I know you're excited:)

So this book is not the most eloquently written book-- sometimes the English girl in me laughs at it-- and sometimes I get real frusturated at the book and disagree with it-- but Neil Cole does make some really good points which I think our team needs to spend some time with. (yes Brandt if you are reading I know that I just ended a sentence with a preposistion, please forgive me). This book does do a good job of critiquing the western church and how we like to do ministry. Besides reading this book, our team just came off of a week at "staff conference" where 100+ of us talked about ministry and from both of these sources-- my mind has been racing about what it looks like to actually love people who do not know or believe in the Gospel.

Both at staff conference and in this book, the discussion has centered on God-- what is He doing? This should be our first question. Not, "what can we do, and then ask God to help us do it," but a genuine searching of what God is doing in this place, where is He changing lives? As Christ's body, why in the world then do we spend so much time trying to plan and organize activities and ignore so much of what is going on outside of the church? We plan a Thursday night meeting- but forget that the vast majority of students are out binge drinking and hooking up with people who they may never see again. Do we/ I care about these people?

I feel convicted to care more for people who never seem to come in contact with someone trying to live out the Gospel in his/ her life. I don't want to step from 1 Christian bubble to the next. But how the heck do I help invite these people into the journey? I'd love for you to join with me in the discussion and in prayer for how to love people who may seem impossible to love. I want to see God change lives with His Truths. I want to see what God is doing in this place. And as I keep thinking about these things-- I realise that ministry is much more than I thought it was. This takes more love, more time, and more of God's Truth in my life than I knew.

This book, and our staff conference covered so much more for me to process. I loved the main speaker-- the director of Agape Ministry in the UK- so much wisdom it wasn't even funny. I guess I can briefly mention a few of his topics/ statements so you know what else I'm processing; Do we need more quiet days or a spiritual earthquake?, God is not suprised by postmodernity, the church is often not a reflection of those in it, Do we take God for granted?, progress & opposition go hand in hand, are Christians too relevant?, never before have we tried to be more relevant, but are so irrelevant, and...he asked us as we left, "would people follow you if they didn't have to?"

So yeah... plenty to think about here. Trying to keep up with Super Tuesday and the election. Jared also got to talk to his Dad, who said that where the family is living right now isn't bad enough to leave. Praying for strength for them. It has been a pure joy to talk with some of you on the phone recently:) I love and miss you all much! -- Lacey

ps- good laugh for you- Kiwis call restrooms, toilets- still seems crude to me, but yesterday when I was playing tennis with 1 of the students and a man asked me where I found water I responded, "oh I just got it in the toilet." Once I thought about this for a moment... I turned red and laughed quite hard at myself. I don't know what I was supposed to say????

bigger than a box

Hello anyone who is reading:) I'm really excited to be able to blog again, but a little bit overwhelmed as to what to say. So I guess more than anything- I hope that what I share with you encourages you and helps you to see God in this crazy thing we call life. And maybe hearing some stories from a different place can remind you of the summer and its inevitability.

I'll do my best to give you a glimpse of summer in NZ thus far with 2 stories/ things I'm processing through-

First has to be my time in Nelson for summer project. For 2 weeks I lived along one of thee most astounding, yet peaceful beaches I've ever seen. I spent lots of time in the kitchen and on the beach. But spending time with my Bible study women- Bexs, Beth, and Lauren- was such a gift. The point of us gathering in Nelson was to grow in our faith and to see others begin living in faith. So... as we met people from all around the world on the beach, we asked them what they thought about God. May seem a bit difficult-- but actually it is absolutely amazing to hear people talk about something that most people avoid. People have much to say. And people have experienced many things that shape who God is to them. Two girls from Switzerland thought that the sun was God. A woman from England thought science was the answer to it all, a student from Germany told us she had never thought about God. And person after person from NZ told us stories how they have never been to church, and do not understand who Jesus is. My favorite part of these conversations is after you listen to people and you actually value what they have to say-- they start to ask you questions. The girls from Switzerland asked us "Well then why do you believe in Jesus?" High school guys from NZ asked us, "Well if going to church and reading the Bible isn't what it's about, then what is Christianity all about?" And still another woman from England asked if we would pray for her- to give her faith that God does forgive, He does love. These conversations may seem crazy, way beyond what you'd ever talk to people about-- but I continue to be amazed at how God is working in the lives of people from every nation. My prayer as I left Ohio was to see that God was bigger than my life, bigger than the walls I build around Him-- and man-- He is. I continue to pray that the people we talked to on the beach will be encouraged to keep asking questions, and keep finding God.

Nelson was wonderful. And after Nelson, our team then took 6 days of "time off" to drive around the South Island. I'm really not sure that any words I could say about this trip would do any better than the pictures. And the pictures are only the beginning. But seeing the beautiful landscapes on the South Island was worth every second of the trip. I'm still praying that God would remind me of what I saw and that He would keep reminding me of His beauty and power.

Last lil bit of update (it's amazing to me if you're still reading). So... some thoughts on what's going on since we're back in Wellington now. Our team has been talking a bit about the US presidential campaign. We have been talking about what it looks like to live in faith- do we vote? do we care? who do we vote for? It is so easy for each of us to say, "Man I'm so overwhelmed, I have no idea how to pick a candidate and how to get good info about each of them. I'm just going to not care." I know I do it. But reality is, choosing to not care is a huge decision, with big consequences. To keep this short- I decided that Jesus cares and so I'm called to care. And not just to care, but to get off my butt and maybe put a little effort into such things. So I found this quiz- http://www.gotoquiz.com/candidates/2008-quiz.html -which you can check out- where you enter what you think about issues and it helps you pick a candidate (I do not yet know if this is the best quiz, alls I'm saying is start somewhere). So just last night, we were talking about this quiz and politics when I asked my friend next to me who is from South Africa, "Hey Jared, you're from Africa how would you answer this question about what the US should do in places such as Africa?" This question grew into something much bigger to me. As Jared answered the question I heard him talk about his family, how the gov't where they live is so corrupt his Dad's business may go under in the next month, how the gov't has taken away electricity b/c they didn't care to conserve it and now they are out of it for 5years, and how thousands of people are getting murdered-- in SOUTH AFRICA. Which is supposedly a 1st world country.

So I stepped back a moment to think about what is going on and how much I've cared in the past. Now I've got a friend from this place, 5 friends from this place, and I want to know why I think I can choose to not care. I'm not trying to overwhelm or to guilt-- I'm trying to get us to care. I'm trying to listen to what God has to say about this world and what we can do while we're here. There are no perfect answers. No president will fix everything. The problems in Africa are not easy. I'm just trying to learn and hear that God does have something to say about this. He does care. And it doesn't matter if it's going to take a lil effort on my part.

So yes NZ is a tiny country-- but I can't get over how many countries are represented here. And how much the Gospel changes everything in every place. I'd love to hear from you guys-- and let me know if you have any good info about the elections-- I love to hear what others are learning on their journey.~ Lacey

ps please join with me in praying for Jared and his family- we are praying right now that his Dad would get enough electricity for him to call NZ.

eye candy

I'll make it even easier for you.... here's the amazing slide show which Justin made...kind of makes the photos I posted below unnecessary... but he's just good like that.

Not enough hours in the day.

Well... I at least got some photos added for all of you to check out of our South Island travels. Our team is driving to Auckland tomorrow so I won't be able to really write about the trip until we get home..... but you just wait.... lots of good stories and things to recap for you! Until then... have fun with the photos:)

Love and miss you all. Can't wait to blog some stories and talk/ write to you guys individually!
--Lace

Date night

Justin's guys made us a surprise breakfast, got us some gelato for the afternoon, and took us for a picnic/ bonfire on the beach at night. That night was my favorite. I even ate a grub... like the ones on Lion King!

Amazing people, amazing memories.

Our whole project on the last night. 40+ of us spent 2 weeks in Nelson together-- brought back all my Va Beach memories-- and now I have more amazing summer project friends.

Lanarch Castle

I think I'm becoming my Mom... I made the whole team go see this castle- but yes Mom it was amazing. The only one in NZ and wow- were the views spectacular! We have great photos from the gardens outside.

Baldwin Street

The steepest street in the world! Justin jogged up it, I took my time. One guy even died trying to go down this in a wheelborrow. Min- I'm gonna learn how to go down this on rollerblades- you just wait!

Moraki Boulders

Our team enjoyed this stopping point in our drive-- these boulders and their roundness are loved by NZers. What a beautiful day.

Queenstown

This is the view of Queenstown from the top of the mountains. It's a town very much like a ski town in Colorado. We were only there for about 15 hours-- but it was pretty.

photos can't do it justice

Really huge waterfalls! We took a 2 hour boat ride around Milford Sound- we saw dolphins and seals- and could still not take in the views. Imagine huge mountains on both sides of you, a waterfall up ahead, and mist all around you.

Drive to Milford- which I actually drove!

For 2 hours we drove along this view- rainbows, waterfalls, and tall mountains- to get to Milford Sound- what some call the 8th world wonder. Most majestic thing I've ever seen.

nice faces guys

This is the before photo. I think I'm exaggerating a lil bit... but I was freaked that I was about to jump from a plane. Justin and Kara were excited, I was scared. But afterwards those 2 didn't feel well and I wanted to go again.

flying people

That's me on top with the yellow, Justin next with the blue, and Kara on the bottom with the pink-- flying through the air. At this point I'm screaming-- "It's soooooo cool, everyone needs to do this!, is that Justin?" And all the while- Hank is letting me steer the parachute.

best part of the trip!

Yeah I know the outfits are attractive. But check out Hank in the white... he's the guy I jumped with and was my new best friend... at least when we were 12,000 feet above the earth falling down towards it. So fun! So worth it!

I love waterfalls

Waterfalls were all around the glaciers. But my favorite part of the waterfalls was the sound! Power & beauty!

love the glaciers

It was even warmer at Franz glacier. We walked around all of these rocks to get as close as we could. And yes, I did steal a little rock for Grandma and Jake- I thought you guys would appreciate one:)

beauty at its best

This is a real picture. I can't really even believe it and I was there. In the distance is Franz Joseph Glacier... the 2nd glacier we stopped at-- gorgeous!!!

glaciers to top it all off

This is Fox Glacier... the 1st glacier I've ever seen! The colors were so fun! It really wasn't too cold even when we were standing next to it.

still eating good

Out for a team Christmas dinner... we got Italian in honor of our Italy Stinters:) Or just because we like it. It was delicious and I made cut-out cookies for dessert- yummm!

lime green... the new black

My Mom got me a full set of lime green pj's... what did your Mom get you? They are way comfy Mom and the color is delightful.

Christmas morning!

Us girls with our gifts sent from Mommy & Daddy. Thanks Mom & Dad! Notice the tree behind us.. it was small, but it was pretty!

They even have Christmas here!

I promised to try and keep you in the loop of how Kiwis celebrate Christmas... and I don't want to let you down. So here are some of the best moderations from a Christmas in the States that I can think of....
1. Instead of the song "let it snow" they sing "It'll never snow, It'll never snow"
2. barbeques... not chestnuts by the fire.... steaks on the grill
3. not Santa Clause most of the time... Father Christmas
4. the day after Christmas is not just a busy shopping day... it's a National holiday called Boxing Day (no Kiwi even knows why or what this day actually is)
5. and best of all..... Christmas is a day earlier here:)

Christmas came and went

I think most of you have seen the first Home Alone-- the scene at the beginning when everyone in the house is running around getting ready for their trip-- that is what my day has been like today. Ahhhhh our whole team leaves tomorrow for a 3 week trip and I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by all the details that need done before we leave.

Justin and I will be spending the first 2 weeks in Nelson (a sunny city on the South Island) helping lead a beach project of 40 other staff and students. And after project, our team is going to join up and drive around the South Island for 6 days. I'm really excited about both parts of the trip-- but I can't help but feel like my life has suddenly torpedoed into a whole new speed. And I don't see it slowing down any time soon.

Life seems to feel rushed all too often. My solution is to make a to-do list-- I write down every possible thing I need to do and I keep track as I go. I've got one sitting next to me right now (yes blogging is on the list). It is a very efficient way to get things done and not forget what comes next. Crossing off things gives you a great sense of accomplishment, too. I live by to-do lists.

Only problem is, is that I don't know how to escape to-do list mode. I treat every part of my life this way it seems-- my morning routine is a mental check list, steps in life feel like a check in the box, my friendships can feel more like to-do's, and so often... I try to figure out how to put my relationship with God down on a to-do list as well.

1. read my Bible
2. go to church
3. tell other people about Jesus.
4.
5.
6.

I'm pretty good about filling in the numbers... I'm just not sure where they get me. I really started to think about this when I was planning our South Island trip. Every person I've ever talked to who is acquainted with New Zealand raves about the beauty and wonderfulness of that part of the world. They call it the 8th world wonder, the Lord of the Rings haven, the best part of this country. So of course we had to put a South Island trip on our to-do list. Where did I go from there-- I talked to as many people as I could about what we needed to do when we're there. I made a list of the things I wanted to see. I found a driving route. And now we are going to systematically drive for 6 days to see and do everything on the list.

But why? If I go to each of these places and complete the list- then what happens?

I'm not so sure. And I'm afraid I don't know how to treat the trip not like a to-do list. And I'm afraid that if I treat it like a list, I'll miss so much, I'll turn it into something that it's not. What does life look like without the list? If my relationship with God is not a to-do list, then what the heck is it? I think this is why I have trouble understanding or enjoying some games, ideas, and experiences. They don't follow a pattern, a list, or an equation. I try to make them.... but this makes it worse.

I think I even make Christmas out to be a list.

Oh Merry Christmas by the way:) I hope it was merry and bright!

But yes... Christmas on a to-do list... buy some presents, make some food, think about the manger story, spend time with family (or call them on the phone), and wha-la...you have Christmas. Except it doesn't feel like it. Oh I must have forgot the snow. Nope still doesn't exactly feel like Christmas. Oh I must have forgot the carols, or the candy canes, or .... It doesn't matter, Christmas won't be put on a list. I try to do it every year. And trying to make it into a list, makes it worse. Makes it feel less like Christmas.

God didn't start with a list. Jesus wasn't on most people's list. Nothing is on God's list, but nothing is off of His list either. He's way outside of such a list... and I want to try and be there, too.

Well, that's where I'm at right now, and those are my Christmas thoughts. I'm feeling a bit tired, a bit excited, and a bit unsure.

It wasn't too bad spending Christmas away, but I wish my family could have been here with me. Our team exchanged gifts, made a delicious meal, saw lights, went to church, and thought about our Savior coming as a baby. It was a full day.

The last week or so has been BUSY. Justin and I have spent lots of time preparing for project, my flatmates and I have caught 4 mice inside our flat, our team had a lot of Chritmas-y things to do, and I've spent some of my favorite times with a student named Johnnie:) I can't thank any of you enough for your Christmas wishes, cards, and packages-- they were the highlight of many days. And yes we did feel the earthquake that happened a few days before Christmas.

If you don't hear a ton from me for the next 3 weeks it's because I'm in the middle of the wild, trying to take in what's around me, but not living off of a to-do list. I'm hoping to not chicken out of sky-diving in Queenstown- the adventure capital of the world. I can't wait to share some of our adventures with you:)

Please pray that I can experience the joy of summer project amidst the busyness, and I'll pray that you can slow down and see all the joy around you. New Zealand is beautiful... but not as beautiful as hearing from all of you. All my love.... Lacey

Not so silent night.

We had a Student Life Christmas gathering at "Carols at the Basin." We all met, ate dinner, and sang Christmas carols together. It really is fun to celebrate Christmas in the Southern hemisphere-- it felt like a summer picnic. Afterwards everyone came to our house for dessert and stayed until 1:30 am!

stop and smell the roses

Our team had a nice lil photo shoot at the rose gardens in Wellington. There were over 300 different roses there-- amazing!